RELATIONSHIPS & STAYING SAFE
RESPECT. TRUST. BOUNDARIES. YOU.
Relationships are part of life — friendships, family, dating and the people we meet online. Learning what feels healthy, understanding your boundaries and recognising when something isn't right are important independent-living skills.
WHAT DOES HEALTHY LOOK LIKE?
GOOD RELATIONSHIPS SHOULD FEEL GOOD
RESPECT
You listen to each other and respect each other's choices.
TRUST
You don't feel that you constantly have to prove yourself.
COMMUNICATION
You can talk about how you feel.
BOUNDARIES
Both people can say what they're comfortable and uncomfortable with.
SPACE
You can have your own friends, interests and time apart.
EQUALITY
One person doesn't control the other.
CARING ABOUT SOMEONE DOESN'T MEAN CONTROLLING THEM.
YOUR BOUNDARIES
WHAT'S OK WITH YOU?
A boundary is a limit you set around what you're comfortable with and how you expect other people to treat you.
Someone wants to read your messages.
A friend keeps borrowing money and doesn't repay it.
Someone expects you to answer their messages immediately.
A person you're dating wants to know where you are all the time.
Someone pressures you to do something you don't want to do.
How would this make you feel?
What could you say?
Who could you talk to if they didn't respect your boundary?
CONSENT
CONSENT MATTERS
Consent is a clear, voluntary agreement to do something together. In relationships and friendships, it means checking that everyone is comfortable and happy with what's happening. It’s about communication, respect and safety.
Consent should be freely given.
You can change your mind.
Being in a relationship doesn't automatically mean consent.
Pressure, threats or manipulation are not healthy ways to obtain agreement.
YOUR BODY. YOUR CHOICE.
THEIR BODY. THEIR CHOICE.
SIGNS OF A HEALTHY RELATIONSHIP
✓
They respect your choices
✓
You can be yourself
✓
You can disagree without being frightened
✓
They listen to you
✓
They respect your friends and interests
✓
They accept “no”
✓
You don't feel constantly watched or controlled
✓
You feel able to talk honestly
NOTICE THE WARNING SIGNS
One sign on its own doesn't tell you everything about a relationship, but patterns of controlling, frightening or harmful behaviour should be taken seriously.
CONTROL
Trying to decide who you see, what you wear or where you go.
JEALOUSY
Extreme jealousy being presented as proof that somebody cares.
PHONE CHECKING
Demanding passwords or constantly checking messages/location.
PRESSURE
Repeatedly pushing you into things you don't want.
PUT-DOWNS
Humiliating, insulting or deliberately making you feel worthless.
THREATS
Using fear or threats to get their own way.
ISOLATION
Trying to separate you from friends, family or other support.
ONLINE RELATIONSHIPS
ONLINE COUNTS TOO
- People online aren't always who they say they are.
- Think carefully before sharing personal information.
- Be cautious about sharing your location.
- Never feel pressured into sending intimate images.
- Block and report accounts that make you uncomfortable.
- Tell somebody you trust if an online relationship starts worrying you.
WOULD YOU BE COMFORTABLE WITH THIS PERSON OR CONVERSATION OFFLINE?
REAL LIFE
WHAT WOULD YOU DO?
Someone you've been seeing starts asking for your phone password. They get angry when you spend time with friends and keep asking you to share your location. They say it's only because they care about you.
What concerns you about this?
Which boundaries are being crossed?
What could the person do next?
Who could they talk to?
CONTROL ISN'T THE SAME AS CARE.
Grooming involves somebody deliberately building trust or a relationship in order to manipulate or harm. Recognizing signs is a key skill.
If something feels unsafe, talk to somebody you trust.
GROOMING & EXPLOITATION
WHEN TRUST IS USED TO TAKE ADVANTAGE
Unexpected gifts or money
Pressure to keep secrets
Pressure away from friends/family
Sex, drugs, money or crime pressure
Threats or blackmail
Feeling that you owe someone
IT'S NOT JUST ABOUT DATING
✓ Respect & Trust
✓ Supporting each other
✓ Being able to say no
✓ Handling different interests
GOOD FRIENDSHIPS HAVE BOUNDARIES TOO.
YOUR NEXT STEP
KNOW YOUR BOUNDARIES
Challenge: Write down three things that matter to you in a healthy relationship or friendship.
RESPECT SHOULD GO BOTH WAYS.
1.
2.
3.
FROM THE NEXSTEPS WORKBOOK
BUILD HEALTHIER RELATIONSHIPS
The Nexsteps Independent Living Skills Workbook explores relationships, boundaries, consent, staying safe and recognising exploitation through practical activities, scenarios, discussion and reflection.